


hands down, can't let myself forgеt it

by littleboxes



Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV)
Genre: (its not a redemption shes a Child she just Grows As A Person), Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Carrie Wilson Redemption, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Episode: s01e09 Stand Tall, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Good Friend Flynn (Julie and The Phantoms), Grief/Mourning, Healthy Coping Mechanisms, Julie Molina-centric, Light Angst, Moving On, Post-Canon, Sibling Bonding, carrie can have some character growth as a treat, in a soft healthy way, nongraphic descriptions of implied depression
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-24
Updated: 2020-10-24
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:41:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,059
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27178039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littleboxes/pseuds/littleboxes
Summary: "Something's wrong. The boys were getting those jolts pretty bad as I was leaving. And they wouldn't stand me up again. They must have run out of time. [...] They didn't cross over. They're gone. And I didn't even get to say goodbye."A universe where Julie is right, but everything is still okay, in the end.
Relationships: Alex & Julie Molina & Luke Patterson & Reggie, Carlos Molina & Julie Molina & Ray Molina, Flynn & Julie Molina, Flynn & Julie Molina & Carrie Wilson
Comments: 17
Kudos: 86





	hands down, can't let myself forgеt it

**Author's Note:**

> mmmmmmmmm i love julie so much and stand tall is So Much and i just,,,, ahhhh

_Right now, I'm loving every minute_

_Hands down, can't let myself forgеt it, no_

_'Cause everything is rushing in fast_

_Keep holding on, nеver look back_

She keeps singing, and she spares a single second to look at the crowd, to catch the confusion alongside the cheers- _this is Julie_ and the Phantoms _, isn’t it?_ \- before she turns her attention back to the song. This isn’t about them. 

Her hands don’t shake once as she plays, and her voice never wavers, and when she gets to the pre-chorus and it’s still just her voice singing alone, she lets the tears come and keeps singing. They aren’t here and even though she knows that it doesn’t make it hurt less, but her mom is with her. The dahlia is vibrant on her keyboard. 

She thinks about _we came to see you stick it to the man!_ and knows that wherever they are, even if it isn’t the other side, they’re cheering her on. Same as her mom.

After, there are questions- Rob is confused, but Flynn shoves them all away and wraps Julie in a huge hug, and whisper shouts her pride in Julie’s ear, and soon she’s joined by Dad and Carlos and Tía, and it hurts, but their hugs are warm, and they go home.

(When Carlos follows her into the studio and asks if the boyband is here, she laughs, and then starts crying again. Of course the Ghost Toaster figured it out. It takes a little while to explain, but he holds her hand and snuggles into her side. She tells him their names and he says that Reggie was obviously the coolest, because Julie should’ve _seen_ the look on Tía's face. Julie laughs wetly and says that sounds like something he’d do.)

(Dad gently corners her the next day, to ask what happened to the band. Julie finds that she doesn’t have it in her to lie to him, and explains it. All of it, the way they’d scared the life out of her and then helped badger the life back _into_ her, how they’d let her down at the dance and how close she’d gotten to them and the club and the jolts and- everything. She tells him about Luke’s horrible metaphors and how Reggie really liked singing with him at breakfast and how Alex appreciated that Ray liked their music. 

He’s silent for a while, and then he hugs her very tightly, and then he says, _I wish I could have met these boys that brought such happiness into your life_ and she says, _me too_ , and he says, _so is Luke the reason the electricity bill is so high this month?_ and she says, _I told him to stop staring into the fridge at night!_ and he laughs and says, _well, at least that explains how my keys kept magically appearing in places I knew I already looked_ and Julie laughs and tells him about how much Reggie loved watching Chopped with him.)

There are still bad days, after. Days when she wants to just sit in the studio and cry and Flynn has to hold her and whisper fierce reminders that Julie’s love _isn’t_ poison, days that Flynn drags her downstairs to be rambled at by Carlos about his latest baseball victories, days where Flynn shoves her little brother at her like a burr so Julie has no choice but to remember that she is _here_ and in company and loved. That her mother left, that the boys left, but none of them left her alone. 

On bad days Ray cancels his photo shoots and they all cram on the couch, Flynn flopping over onto Julie’s lap, and they watch _Ghost Hunters_ while Carlos continuously points out how it _couldn’t_ have been the wind, and _Chopped_ while Ray despairs over _how_ people make spaghetti out of vegetables, and _High School Musical_ while Flynn sings along so badly Julie has to join in out of principle. 

Julie still has bad days, but they’re much better, and less frequent, than they used to be.

Most days are good. Most days, she spends hours after school in the studio with Flynn. She shows her where there would be grooves in the rug from Reggie's rocking out, shows her the way Luke flopped onto the couch, the way Alex would only ever sit on the piano or behind his drums, instead of a chair.

Flynn helps her organize the loft. When she finds a few black trash bags of clothes that smell like dust and look achingly familiar, Flynn holds her as she cries and then helps her pick out the ones that fit her best. (And calls dibs on the studded belt she finds, and one of the hoodies, maybe she ends up bringing a small pile home for herself. Julie just smiles, and knows none of the guys would mind.)

(And if Julie starts wearing a flannel shirt that’s a little too big on her on some of the bad days, or an orange beanie that shouldn’t match her outfit but does anyway, or, a slightly worn, pink hoodie, well.)

(A few weeks after, when Julie forgoes Reggie's flannel for one of her mom’s jackets but keeps the beanie, Carrie stops by her locker. Flynn narrows her eyes, but all Carrie says is, _I like the outfit, Molina_ , before walking away. 

_Am I crazy, or did she mean that_ , Julie asks.

 _You have to be crazy, because there’s no way that just happened_ , Flynn says.

But the next day Carrie gives them a nod when she passes them in the hallway, and Flynn glares back and Julie just looks thoughtful. 

It's a slow process, littered with insults and hurt and mistrust on both sides. Carrie apologizes and Flynn throws it in her face and Julie isn’t sure about any of it, but it can’t hurt to try and regain a friend after losing three, and Flynn was always more hurt over Carrie’s absence than she’d ever admit and it’s _nice_ , to fall back into old rhythms while making new ones.

Eventually, on Julie’s bad days, there’s another body squeezed onto the couch, if awkwardly, and there are three voices singing along to _High School Musical_ , and the bad days are still bad, but the hugs are still warm, and Julie keeps going on.

**Author's Note:**

> im on jatp tumblr @reggiesnecklace if you'd like to come scream about this show with me


End file.
